Category Archives: Marriage

The Life We Live

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Lots of moving…
Moving…
Moving…
Moving far from home…
Moving two cars, three kids and one dog…all riding with HER of course.
Moving sofas to basements because they won’t go in THIS house;
Moving curtains that won’t fit;
Moving jobs and certifications and professional development hours.
Moving away from friends;
Moving toward new friends;
Moving her most important luggage: her trunk full of memories.

Often waiting…
Waiting…
Waiting…
Waiting for housing.
Waiting for orders.
Waiting for deployments.
Waiting for phone calls.
Waiting for reunions.
Waiting for the new curtains to arrive.
Waiting for him to come home, For dinner…AGAIN!

They call her ‘Military Dependent’, but she knows better:   She is fiercely In-Dependent.

She can balance a check book;
Handle the yard work;
Fix a noisy toilet;
Bury the family pet…
She is intimately familiar with drywall anchors and toggle bolts.
She can file the taxes;
Sell a house;
Buy a car;
Or set up a move…all with ONE Power of Attorney.

She welcomes neighbors that don’t welcome her.
She reinvents her career with every PCS;
Locates a house in the desert,
The Arctic,
Or the deep south.
And learns to call them all ‘home’.
She MAKES them all home.
jess
Military Wives are somewhat hasty…They leap into:
Decorating,
Leadership,
Volunteering,
Career alternatives,
Churches,
And friendships.

They don’t have 15 years to get to know people.
Their roots are short but flexible.
They plant annuals for themselves and perennials for those who come after them.

Military Wives quickly learn to value each other:
They connect over coffee,
Rely on the spouse network,
Accept offers of friendship and favors.
Record addresses in pencil…

Military Wives have a common bond: The Military Wife has a husband unlike other husbands; his commitment is unique.
He doesn’t have a ‘JOB’
He has a ‘MISSION’ that he can’t just decide to quit…
He’s on-call for his country 24/7.
But for her, he’s the most unreliable guy in town!
His language is foreign
TDY
PCS
OPR
SOS
ACC
BDU
ACU
BAR
CIB
TAD
And so, a Military Wife is a translator for her family and his. She is the long- distance link to keep them informed;   the glue that holds them together.

A Military Wife has her moments:
She wants to wring his neck;
Dye his uniform pink;
Refuse to move to Siberia;
But she pulls herself together.

Give her a few days,
A travel brochure,
A long hot bath,
A pledge to the flag,
A wedding picture,
And she goes.

She packs.
She moves.
She follows.

Why?
What for?
How come?

You may think it is because she has lost her mind.
But actually it is because she has lost her heart.
It was stolen from her by a man,
Who puts duty first,
Who longs to deploy,
Who salutes the flag,
And whose boots in the doorway remind her that as long as he is her Military Husband,
She will remain his military wife.
And would have it no other way.

–Author Unknown

What a slacker!

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In the last couple of a days I have been combing through my blog for old recipes and realized it has been over 5 1/2 months since my last post. I genuinely wish I could say I have just been soooooooooo busy that I couldn’t possibly get online and write, and in some ways I have been (more on that later). Pat started a new job in May and that has definitely kept him busy and gone a lot. Currently, he is in Oklahoma for 2 months and not too thrilled about it. According to him Ft. Sill makes Fayetteville look like New York City. Just before heading there he spent 10 days in Alaska working and loved that (being the outdoor personality he is). Unfortunately, we will be spending Thanksgiving apart, but will be celebrating Christmas together here in North Carolina. It will be the first time I haven’t gone home for the holidays, but we have a lot going on this year and we just can’t leave. With that being said, I am bound and determined to decorate the house as much as possible for Christmas.

66° 33′ 39″ N

In August, Pat and I ventured out to the great state of California to visit Pat’s sister who lived just outside of San Fransisco (my favorite city EVER). The land of avocados and feelings (as well as Priuses and 12 artichokes for $1). It was wonderful to meet more of his family out there and spend 5 glorious days doing whatever we wanted. Our excursions ranged from hiking, wandering around San Fran, eating at some interesting restaurants (Francis Ford Coppola’s and one of the singers of Green Day), sight-seeing Monterey and visiting the Monterey Bay Aquarium. At one point during the trip Pat and Madeleine witnessed me singing karaoke at Clint Eastwood’s restaurant in Carmel (which if you knew me you know this is SO out of character for me). One of the best parts of the trip was taking advantage of the on post lodging at Presidio in Monterey. Since California can be a costly trip it was nice to have the Army lodging available to cut costs a bit. We decided from now on trying to visit interesting places with on post lodging near by and take advantage of it.

View from Presidio’s lodging.

Since Pat moved to a new job in May, it helped us start making some decisions on more “permanent” arrangements here in North Carolina. Now, of course, this is the Army we are talking about and nothing is permanent. Currently, we are renting a home from a good friend of Pat’s and while it has been a great home for us, it is not somewhere we feel is truly ours to grow in. Simple things like decorating are such a deterrent in a rental home that I haven’t been able to make the house feel like a home. With that all being said Pat and I decided to start house hunting. I understand that typically this is a long searching process, but we have the house we wanted in the first neighborhood we looked at. If you are interested in what the inside will look like (obviously somethings will be slightly different) you can click here and check it out. After what felt like forever, they have finally started the building process and we are hoping to be in sometime around the New Year. Pat and I are so very excited to have the space to host family and friends and plenty of bedrooms to accommodate everyone.

The frame going up 10/12/12.

My “new” job (been there since the end of March) has been keeping me nice and busy while Pat has been gone. It has been wonderful working for a doctor who not only care about his continuing education but the education for the staff as well. I had the privilege to attend a conference in Orlando last month and really enjoyed it. It was nice to be back in Florida for a bit (saw a few friends and family after the conference was over). I am always interested in hearing what other offices are doing to attract business to their practice. Along with the implant treatment coordinating, I have taken over a lot of the marketing aspects for the office. Never a dull moment in my little corner of the office that is for sure.

Well that is really it for now. I will try to keep you all in the loop a bit more. Keep your eye out for a new blog starting up also! More details coming soon!

Did you see that?! It’s Time and it’s flying by…

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Well, it has been awhile since I have been able to get on here and post about anything. This last month has been absolutely nuts. March was filled with birthdays (mainly mine), baby showers and so many other random events. My birthday came and went pretty quiet. Pat was out in the field, so it was just me and the dogs. After that I headed to Florida for a baby shower. I did have a blast being able to go home for a few days and catch up with my friends and family. Meredith is super special and I am excited to meet Ellee (who it due to arrive any day now). That would make 11 friends of mine who have/are delivering over the next few months. Last weekend there were 3 born on all the same day. There is something going on with the water down in Florida 🙂

I had the chance to visit my old roommate and their newest addition to the family. Hunter has been in NICU since January. Here he is with the stuffed giraffe I gave him while I was there. Hunter has done remarkably well and his parents have been incredible through this entire ordeal. It’s nice to know that Hunter is now home and able to start having a “normal” baby life.

Since the Florida trip I have also been on a diet. After hopping on a scale while I was down there I decided enough was enough and it was time to do something. So far I have dropped 12lbs and I am sticking this out till I drop at least 15 more. Not doing it for any particular reason other then just wanting to feel better all around. It has been pretty easy to stick with it since Pat has been gone out in the field pretty much since I got back from Florida. Always makes it a little easier when you are only having to worry about cooking for only one person. Instead of having to make two separate meals.

The other day I did also notice that we have three weddings in the next couple of months that we will be attending. Thankfully, Solomon reminded me that his wedding was THIS June and not next year. We would have really been up a creek. Their wedding is in Charleston and the guys have a four day weekend, so we will hang around there and scope things out. I attended a bridal shower this past Saturday for our friends John and Crystal. They will be getting married towards the end of June. The following weekend two very close friends of ours will be getting married in Wilmington. So exited for Matty and Danielle. Especially since Matty is one of the first people I met here, and I always love being at that very beginning of relationships and seeing them get all the way to being married. So basically as I type this out I am now realizing there is a wedding every weekend once we get into mid-June. Get out you running shoes, Patrick. It’s going to be a busy few weeks.

March was also the start of a new career path for me. I have been very excited to be back in the medical setting and getting back into the groove of everything. One perk to working for dental and oral surgeons…half-day Fridays!!! BONUS!!! It is amazing how just a few extra hours one day a week can make such a huge difference. There is more time for me to enjoy the weekends with Pat then trying to get the house straitened up. Thought Pat has been gone so much over the last few weeks the house hasn’t gotten all that untidy. Talk about cutting down your laundry load…whew! He did come home for a day last weekend and also brought home the new MultiCam uniforms that deployed Army units are currently wearing. It looks like a bomb went off in the office and upstairs. I seriously have got to get some sewing lessons and figure out what to do with all the retired uniform patterns we now have in the house. Of course it always happens that while Pat is out in the field I get bit with the decorating bug. Mostly I do it to just stay busy and not get too “depressed” he is gone. My latest project took a little bit of time to complete just because I had to find the corks to complete the project. It took some doing but here is my finished product. Basically what you are looking at is a tray from Hobby Lobby, corks (that I split in half which I would NOT recommend doing), and hot glue to attach. Next time I will just make sure to have enough whole corks for whatever project I am doing. I about took off a finger in the process of splitting the corks.

Along with the projects I have also been baking a little here and there. I made some oatmeal raisin chocolate chip cookies last weekend that came out really good! I ended up substituting the butter for Kelapo coconut oil. YUM! It helped keep the cookies so moist. I highly recommend checking them out. One of my close girlfriends works with them and it’s awesome to support a smaller company. I also mastered the art of using pyhllo. Yikes, what a learning experience. I made 100 phyllo cups using this spinach dip recipe for the bridal shower I attended last weekend. The only reason I keep making them it they turn out great, but if you don’t have the patience of Job then I recommend buying the premade cups instead of making them on your own.

Pollen Made Me Cry

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To say the last couple weeks have been rough would be a bit of an understatement.  Now, I tread very carefully when I say that because I have some girlfriends going through deployments right now and I know how hard that is for them. Unfortunately, these last 2 weeks have really gotten to the better part of me.

Pat has been out in the field for the last two weeks, that means we play the “brace yourself for something/everything to go wrong” game. Do you know this game? No? Well, let me help you better understand it. Anytime Pat leaves for a decent amount of time two things happen. One, we have really terrible weather (not true this time around). Two, I have some form a disaster arise. Of course these problems NEVER happen when he is home…ever.

Case #1 – My birthday was last Tuesday and with Pat gone I knew I was going to have the evening to myself. I didn’t do anything to spectacular just fixed a pot of spaghetti to separate out for further meals. Wednesday I woke up sick as a dog. I had no idea what was causing it but it wasn’t pretty. I finally had to peel myself off the floor and get ready for work. Normally I would have called in because that kind of sick didn’t need to leave the house, but I was in my last two weeks and felt terrible doing that to them. I stopped and picked up some Gatorade to try and rehydrate. Long story short I got to work and by 1 had to leave. Throwing up in the bathroom was a little much. As I headed home I kept getting worse and worse. Ended up having to go to Urgent Care to get some fluids due to dehydration. Of course went to work the next day. The rest of the week I was shot.

Case #2 – We recently acquired a new fur baby who wasn’t fully house trained (she is now yay!) so accidents weren’t totally uncommon. I kept noticing though every time I was near the fridge, dishwasher or sink I kept stepping into small amounts of water. Well, no offensive to the dog but I was blaming her. Felt like every time I moved I was stepping in more. The other morning at the butt crack of dawn I discovered the source of the problem. The water was seeping up from the between seams of the tile. So step then ooze. Totally gross. I had a close friend of ours come over and try and help me find the source because visibly didn’t see anything. After he left and the dogs were outside raising cane I heard it. Drip. Drip. Drip. The Chinese water torture rhythm coming from somewhere under the dishwasher. At this point I am flat on the floor staring at the appliance (because staring at it helps). I grabbed the Philips and took off the bottom panel to see this tiny steady drip. Now what? Well logic would tell you to shut the water source off. Great, where the heck is that? Every once in awhile “genius” strikes me. My iPhone has the Facetime feature where when you call someone and if they have it too they can see you. DAD! Called him up and basically stuck him under the sink to help me figure out what to do next. I still have to have a plumber come out, but at least I know what  the deal is.

Case #3 – I love animals and I love my dogs, but that drive me nuts sometimes. When I get home from work I literally do not sit down with them around. I know you are thinking. I am exaggerating or thinking they are just dogs get over it. Just trust me when I tell you they could make the most patient person crack. I use 4 words when I get home…Urban, Cindy, no and stop. This last week Urban has been so wired I haven’t been able to keep up. I know these are not actual children but I feel like I have two toddlers who have SEVERE selective hearing.

So what is the deal with the title of this blog? Pat got me the most beautiful flowers for my birthday and had them delivered to work last week. Friday I had to get them home and traveling with a vase of flowers is just awkward all the way around. At some point during the drive I looked down and I was covered in yellow pollen. That was it. That was my breaking point. Pollen beat me. I burst into tears. I happened to be on the phone talking to my mother (using a hands free device don’t worry) and she was probably wondering what the heck was going.

Well, I guess that about sums up my mental state lately. Fried. I know things will get better once Pat gets home, but he needs to hurry up already.

Simple Reminders

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These hands you are holding on your wedding day are the hands of your best friend, your lover, your confidant and your partner.

 These hands will work with you to build your future and fulfill your mutual dreams.

 These are the hands that will passionately love you and cherish you through the years. With a gentle touch, they will comfort you.

 They will hold you in times of fear and grief. These are the hands that will give you strength when you need it.

 These are the hands that will countless times wipe the tears from your eyes; tears of sorrow, and tears of joy.

 In years to come, these hands, wrinkled and aged, will still be reaching for yours, still giving you the same unspoken tenderness with just a touch

 

Have fun storming the castle…

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Well, Pat and I are back from our Ohio trip and absolutely worn out. We had a blast and could not have asked for a better weekend with his family up there. His Uncle Pete and Aunt Ellie have two Golden Retrievers (Maggie and Winston). The photo below pretty much sums up our weekend of eating too much good food and socializing till we couldn’t stay awake any longer…

I love the holiday time. Everyone is a little more easy going and open to being “themselves”.  The little random quirks that everyone have seen to be a little more acceptable during the festive season. For instance take Leo. He is no way bothered with the fact that I was totally fascinated that he drank out of the fish bowl but left the fish alone, hey who am I to judge?

While we were there we did have the opportunity to meet Aunt Ellie’s mother aka Mimi. It was really nice to see all the grandchildren trekking into Little Sisters of the Poor Nursing  Facility to say Happy Thanksgiving to Mimi. We had brought her some chocolate pie, but she had just eaten and couldn’t handle anymore food at that point. We sat with her for a good while as everyone gave her status reports on the latest happenings going on in their life. Mimi is what I like to call a very fashionable lady. Before we left she wanted to go down to the common area but would not leave her room till she had applied her hot pink lipstick. Course leave it to her to be able to pull off a color like that…me not so much. Before we left we had out photo taken with her (it was nice to be included in the family photo).

We were blessed to have some special guests come to our little wedding ceremony. Pat’s brother and sister came up from Florida, his Uncle Jed drove from Washington D.C. and his grandmother was able to attend as well. It was a real treat to have Pat in uniform because most of them had never seen him in his dress blues. I wasn’t able to see their “first” reactions to him, but someone snapped a photo from my phone. I apologize it wasn’t the greatest picture but I am thankful someone had tried to capture the moment when Grammy Bammy saw him for the first time – warning you may tear up a little 🙂

One of the most memorable highlights from the trip was the fact we were able to Skype with Madeline (Pat’s sister) who is deployed right now. I can’t tell you what a remarkable experience that was. She was halfway around the world but able to talk and say hello to every single person in the room. Pat and I were able to cut the cake in front of her, so she was able to be a apart of out day for even just a little bit. The photo below was taken when we went to see her in Key West for her R&R. From left to right is Pat, Grammy Bammy, Madeleine and Vicki (Pat & Madeline’s mother).

There is A LOT more to share about this trip especially in regards to our ceremony and celebration with the Cleveland family, but I am also waiting till I am able to post the professional photos that were taken that evening. Just had to get some of this down while it was still fresh in my memory.